Monday, June 13, 2011

I, We, C, He, She

We went to Scott Antiques on Saturday.  We had a specific reason.  We wanted to see a man about making a custom gate.  He said he was there every show.  I had photographs, measurements and a sketch.  He was not there. I had his card. I should have called.

We had driven an hour.  C spent $90 filling up his car.  I felt he would rather be home watching a Real World marithon.  We stayed and looked for a while.  I walked fast.

I would like to own these planters for the front veranda.  I would need four.  He had four.  He said they were from a fine home in Aiken, SC.  I did not care.  He would take $950.  I believe he meant $950 each.  We moved on. 


C likes architectural salvage.  We both have a fondness for pediments.  We never learned the cost of this very large and very fine item.  We decided cost did not matter since we have no place to use it and did not know what to do with it.  We checked it out for a long time. I am perplexed as to why someone would hang a red boa on the end of it. 

I wanted to buy this.  I wanted to bring it home with me so I could burn it.  I know I hate it.  I may love it just a bit.

I wish I knew what to do with these.  I think they are too large to use as a purse.

I am reminded that I do not want to be eaten by a bear. I do not want this. I believe you do not need this even if you own a Montana ranch.

I am almost positive this women lived next door to my house when I was six.

I said I thought this chair was interesting.  C told me it was not.  He was right.

C liked these.  She told him they were priced at $950.  I think she had been drinking.  We moved on.

I asked what these were.  She said they were used to clean peanuts.  She seemed irritated when I asked for a further explanation.  She said peanuts are tumbled to remove debris.  I suggested she refer to them as peanut tumblers and they would make interesting hanging lamps.  She said ‘the guys’ (code for gay) who had own them had placed spotlights in the bottom and a fern in the top.  She said it was beautiful.  I rolled my eyes.  She seemed irritated.  

I should have purchased these.  I would then have a nice spot to rest my cocktail refreshment when lounging by the pool.

I already have one of these.  I have had it for a long time.  I saw many of these at Scott's.  I feel everyone copies me.  I made a mental note to self to move it to a secondary location when I got home.

I found this to be an attractive bench.  He said it was Italian or French. I am not sure I believed him.  He said he would take $1500 for it.  He mistook us for rich people.

C said this was the best item he saw at the show.  I agreed the $750 cost was worth every penny.  I like the concept of daytime free-range chickens.  I could easily collect their eggs and clean their cute house. I could relocate their cute house so they would have fresh grass.  I would have to capture them and put them in their cute house at night.  I am afraid I would easily tire of this chore in less then two days.  I would forget to capture the chickens and put them in their safe house at night.  I believe foxes would eat my free-range chickens on the third night.  I believe weeds would grow around the cute house and it would eventually fall apart.

We liked this.  We could think of no practical use for it at our home other than collecting junk.  We decide it was best to leave it at Scott Antique Market.

We both liked these.  I thanked God there is no place for us to attach them to our house. 

I wanted these doors.  I realize I have no place to use them.  He said they were sold.  He said they sold for $4500.  I pretended to be disappointed. 

I do not want anyone to give me anything like this as a gift.  I will put it in my yard sale pile.


We bought this.  We will place it on the top of the garden shed.  I will get around to it someday.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Granada Villa

I have said many times before I'm a column and hedge kinda guy.  So you can easily understand my excitement when I saw this!  It's a villa in the city of Granada.  The villa complex was designed by Jose Maria Rodriguez-Acosta who was an early 20th century painter.  The photo to the right is a statue of Apollo against a cypress hedge.  The marble colonnade was discovered by the artist in a coach house in Madrid and moved to the site.  The complex and gardens were developed in the early 20th century, designed to be a place of work, rest and recreation.  I could work, rest and recreate here with absolutely no problem. My favorite sentence in the article about this villa reads "Around every corner, your eye is caught by a cluster of putti, a goddess in drapery or a nude god on a high pedestals - sights complemented by the sound effects of burbling fountains and jets spurting over a reflecting pool." So, in other words, it's just another Alabama trailer park. 

Photography is by Ricardo Labougle from The World of Interiors - May 2009. 










Wednesday, June 8, 2011

The Boxwood Garden

I want to show some pics of the Boxwood Garden.  Sometimes I forget how much things have really changed around here over the years.  Then I run across old photos and I’m reminded we do actually get off our asses and get things accomplished once in awhile. 

And related, I want to show you my favorite new yard toy.  If you have a man in your life this is the perfect Father’s Day gift - assuming you have foliage in your yard that needs attention.  Also, if your guy has a tendency to be a tad lazy sometimes, like yours truly – even better.  These are very lightweight and easy to use.  In fact, if he’s very lazy and you generally consider him to be useless around the house and your intent is not to live in a Grey Gardens environment, these are lightweight enough for anyone to handle with no problem.  They’re from Greenworks.  You can order them online @ greenworkstools.com 

There are a couple of different options, i.e. battery size etc… And the site will tell you if there's a dealer in your area.


I’m into hedges, so there’s lots of trimming that needs to take place here on the farm.  Early on we stopped buying basic run of the mill power tools.  The cheap stuff doesn’t last around here.  Like most guys I like power tools, especially the ones that cut and mow things down.  My problem isn’t being able to use them; it’s taking the time to do the required maintenance to ensure their continued use.  I generally treat power tools like I do automobiles.  I use it until it stops, then I go get another one similar to the one I just broke.  Sometimes I don’t know if I’m more of an Oliver Wendell Douglass or more Lisa!

We already had a pair of industrial strength hedge trimmers.  The kind with an eight foot extended pole, gas powered and with a giant strap-on harness.  After about 15 minutes of using them you felt like you were going to pass out! 


See this picture of the boxwood garden.  That was about 10 years ago.  I copied it after a friend’s in California.  He used traditional American Boxwoods, which are slow growing.  I don’t have that kind of patience so I used Korean Boxwoods, which grow like weeds.  The next photo is the Boxwood Garden today taken from the same spot.  It really should be trimmed back about 3 times a year.  With the big trimmers I could usually manage to do it about twice a year.  And I dreaded it so much; I would put it off way too long.  It usually took all weekend.  Every 30 minutes I’d have to rest or die.  Then it would take an hour to get the trimmers cranked again.  Afterwards I’d be overcome with gas fumes, unable to stand up straight and my body would vibrate uncontrollably for 2 days. 

So when C told me he was going to waste money order an environmentally conscience battery powered trimmer online, I assumed they would not cut anything and break in about a week.  Actually, I assumed they would show up broken straight out of the box. 

But I was wrong.  This sucker works great.  I cut the boxwood garden in a couple of hours over Memorial Day Weekend.  Actually I started on Saturday and finished on Sunday, because with continuous use the battery only last about 90 minutes.  But it recharges quick enough and I finished up the next morning. The whole thing took about less than 3 hours including cleaning the paths and raking up all the trimmings.  Besides, if you need to cut for longer than 90 minutes at a time, hire a gardener. 

I trimmed all kind of things last weekend.  I would show you before and after pics, but I was so eager to get outside and use my trimmers that I forgot to take before pics.  Maybe it will also work for your guy too.

Oh…here are more before and after shots of the Boxwood Garden.


This is the second fall season after planting all 250 plus plants. 
The white picket fence was replaced with a new brick and wood panel taller version.

And today.  The fence panels are now white and with no curved top.
There's a 3 car parking pad on the opposite side of the fence.
Gates have been added and the fence now extends into
the front garden.

This spot was a driveway when we firsted moved here.  I didn't
like how it was positioned and it was slightly lower than
the side yard, so the boxwood garden was born.
 
The same view today which is now from the side walkway.  You can see a bit of
of how the side and front gardens have been relandscaped.
         


Sunday, June 5, 2011

How Hot Is It?

I start complaining when the temperature drops below 70 degrees.  I don’t like the cold weather, but it’s been too damn hot for almost two weeks now.  It’s not supposed to be 95 this early in June.  The water in the pool is close to the boiling point.  It might not be so bad if it would rain, even a little!  I don’t remember what water falling from the sky is like anymore.  The grass has turned brown and it’s a daily struggle to keep the garden watered, not to mention all the new hedge planting we put in earlier in the spring. 

You have no idea how close I am to stripping buck ass naked, standing in the yard and straying myself with a garden hose!  Really.  Even Bandit the Obnoxious Cat doesn't seem to mind when I aim a garden hose in his direction! 
It’s made me think again about an outdoor shower.  I’ve wanted one for a long time, but wondered if I’d really use it.  My thought was it might be nice to have an outdoor shower after a long day of cutting the meadows or working in the garden, but then I thought the water would be too cold and I wouldn’t use it.  Wrong.  If I had one of these I’d be standing under it now!












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